I am SO ready for my close up!

2004-07-15

I got a call right when I got home from work yesterday. It was a guy from Bush/Cheney '04 and he was wondering if he could send a reporter over to my place to "cover" the dinner party. I was all "Another reporter at one of my dinners?". Actually I said something really stupid like "Gee, I guess I should really clean the house then" and agreed! So there will be MEDIA COVERAGE of us eating BBQ sandwiches tonight!

I'm so jazzed about this now that I will be crushed if a reporter doesn't show up. To be completely frank, I can't imagine that this would make an interesting story. But if nothing interesting happens today or overnight, you may be seeing us in some D class news outlet like the ..the... gosh I don't even know what our local city paper is called. Well, you know what I mean.

I HATE clearing audit points. That's what I am supposed to be doing this week. Instead, I am goofing off about 85% of the time and trying to work through the programs in my spare time. I am so irritated that if my boss had just walked through the audit programs with us from the get go, we wouldn't have to go back and rewrite them. I mean, sorry I'm not psychic Mr. boss-man, how the hell was I supposed to know to ask all sorts of other questions that are completely not in the program?

OK, I fell better now about that.

Who wants to hear some baby info?

WHAT'S HAPPENING WITH YOU (meaning me)

Rapid acceleration of hormones can cause your face to break out. Wash your face twice a day with a gentle cleaner and drink plenty of water. If you are taking vitamin B6 to help with nausea, you may find it also improves the condition of your skin.

This is just super because none of my acne medication has been tested to be safe during pregnancy.  I mean, it's not like pregnancy is a normal human condition or anything so why would they?  Instead it is left up to the mother.  It could be perfectly safe, or she could use it and have a baby with 7 arms.  Who knows.

WHAT'S HAPPENING WITH YOUR BABY

Your baby-to-be is the size of a small bean, measuring in at approximately 9 to 11 millimeters, crown to rump. Dark spots, mark the early formation of the eyes. Pits indicate the formation of nostrils and ears. Your baby's brain is developing rapidly, and limbs and facial characteristics are now forming. Your baby's heart now has a right and left chamber. An ultrasound may be able to detect heart motion. The esophagus and trachea are changing and differentiating into separate tubes, with lungs positioned on either side.

Nostril pits!  I find it so amazing that something only 9mm long can have such a huge effect on my body. 

EATING FOR TWO

Cravings and food aversions are very common during the first trimester. Most of these reactions will disappear by the time you near your fourth month of pregnancy. Contrary to popular belief, craving certain foods does not necessarily indicate that your body is demanding that particular item. So, you may not want to indulge in daily helpings of rocky road ice cream. A good rule of thumb is to indulge in all cravings that are healthy and seek alternatives for your more unhealthy cravings. Perhaps plain yogurt with strawberries can be substituted for strawberry ice cream.

What are these people talking about?  My body clearly NEEDS taco flavored Doritos.  Much like drugs (I mean over the counter and prescription, not crack) no food additives have been tested to be either safe or harmful to pregnant women.  Really the only safe thing to do is to eat raw spinach for 9 months.  And the absolute worst is when people feel compelled to tell you about how they heard on TV once that eating - whatever - can cause birth defects or something awful.  I mean, that would be good if there wasn't some other article out there that says that eating that same thing is actually good for you and the baby.  Really, we've only had since the creation of man to figure out pregnancy, it's not like we'd be that far along yet as to tell whether something like chocolate was either good or bad.

That was fun romp through fetal development, no?  Leo hats hearing about the baby's development.  I don't really understand why.  I find it fascinating.  OK, well I guess I should go back to doing whatever the hell it is I'm paid to do.  I am ditching work early today to ensure that my house is camera ready. 

OMG, and I am dying to unbutton the top of my pants.
 

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