Greetings from the Great White North


Canada is 99% the same as the US. That makes the 1% of difference especially jarring. I wonder if the French feel the same way about Belgium?

So far I have been offered gravy with my fires, been told that all disabled vendor numbers start with Zed (Z), the red meat here tastes funny and I had a long conversation on the PROcess used to add new users to the system. And that's just so far. Every time I let my guard down and feel like I'm really at home, one of the tiny differences crops up. About ten years ago, I got really into lucid dreaming. They say that you can identify when you are dreaming because most everything will be normal but you will notice some subtle changes (like the bricks on one's house may be vertical instead of horizontal or people may talk of making PROgress instead of PRAHgress). Anyway, in a way being in Canada is like being in a slightly altered dream reality.

There are three of us auditors here. Me, a contractor and he who shall be known as Dating for Dummies (as he was once spotted reading that book). We are sharing a desk. Let me say that again, just in case you missed it: three of us are sharing a desk. That's right. We each have our laptop, stacks of papers and three ring binders, as well as coffee cups and a million cables on one 5'x3' desk. Actually, my laptop is on my lap. But it is still damned uncomfortable, especially since the chair I'm in has arms.

Oh yes. It's only 11:30 and the morning and these are the affronts to my person that have already occurred:

    Dating for Dummies belched in response to a question I asked him.

    One of the Computer Operators said he was stalking me and then told me that he heard that girls like to be stalked.

    We ordered chicken just now for lunch (Swiss Chalet, sooo Canadian). I ordered white meat and then Dating for Dummies had to ask me "Do you like white meat? Do you like white meat?" all creepy like.

And I'm likely to be in this auditor refugee camp for another 7 hours today (as well as the next week and a half). Bleah. I think I may have figured out Dating for Dummies' dating problem. DFD is also a graduate of an all boy's school, which furthers my theory on THAT subject.

I slept for ten hours last night. It was lovely. I was so sleepy yesterday. Oh, and I'm reading The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time. Excellent. Except that it makes me feel a little too much like the main character who has a mental problem.

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