Once I got to Las Vegas, I took a cab to the hotel and was hit on by the 85 year old cab driver. He was nice, but he drove the entire way straddling the dotted line in the road.

At the hotel, my dad met me and shoved a wad of cash into my hand for booze and gambling (did I call it of what?). Keep in mind that this was at 1 am EST and I�m usually out by 10.

This morning we had a gorgeous breakfast. We met a father and son from Queens. The son was the one who wanted to come to the convention. He is a letter carrier and has a tic. I would have never pegged him as being into pastry as he�s rather burly. We had a conversation about gooseberries and champagne grapes. He sells chocolate on the side. Fascinating.

We went to the �Star Trek Experience� after breakfast. I spent the whole day cringing. I now own not one, but two Star Trekified photos of myself (Leo � now you have a picture of me for your office). Should you ever have an opportunity to go to Las Vegas with your parents�bring someone else. Trust me.

Just now there was a knock on the door. A man brought me a plate with a fresh lychee (which I have always wanted to try), Italian ham, and assorted other weird things. Last night there was a platter of fruit in my room in which I could only identify a few things. Normally I am the one shoving weird food in people�s faces. I just squirted lychee all over my work laptop. That�ll be a new one for the help desk. The canned lychees are sickly sweet, the fresh one is subtly sweet and reminiscent of all tropical fruit. It still looks like a big eyeball though.

There will be a dessert buffet tonight in the VooDoo Lounge. It�s at the top of the building and we�ll be able to see the fireworks. The competition starts tomorrow.

I wish that I'd read the inferno so that I could accurately tell you which circle of hell this is. Maybe hell has collapsed and this is all of them at once.